Behind the Sun- I wasn’t ready for things I once wanted. It’s a weird sigh of freedom An aloof relief comes after losing. Drink alone from your inner gourd. Reach out; Stretch past the belly of your breaking. Shove your nude emperors out into the forests Out of your front doors. Holographic victories Fall hollow…
True to nature I chose the complicated hike that found me lost and turned every which way around. Stuck for hours somewhere in a long wilderness loop in the Rocky Mountain National Park. Colorado keeps calling me back, an unintended disciple. The lessons becoming easier to learn as I let myself be broken to the teaching. It’s like we’re always on the cusp of knowing, like that point in your day drinking a coffee and laughing with your best friend, or on that cerebral scatterfying acid trip when you figured out the universe, or close to climaxing- the constant verge of almost knowing. Then all is ephemeral again. Wisps of genius flowing back into the void. The curse of peering into secret ethers is forgetting all we weren’t supposed to learn.
Traveling may as well be a time warp because Mexico feels a world away from 8 days ago. I finally see the full picture- all the pieces and posts which have concluded to now. The past 7 marvelous confounding months were influenced by the last couple of intense weeks, and soul-searching couple of months in Texas. An epicene road trip through the American west was underscored by a silent rage tapped for the first time in my life. A legitimate frustration always brewing under the surface of this choppy swoop and clairvoyant waters.
Orbits swirl through swans’ long nests their ivory planets clothed in down. Tens of talents left ungathered pearl yolks- the taste of gold. Revelations ripe abandoned Miracles unhatched, and fucking undersold.